Have you noticed it?
How quickly everything turns into a fight.
How often people talk past each other instead of to each other.
How even simple conversations feel like walking through a minefield.
We’re surrounded by noise, not connection.
By opinions, not understanding.
By constant talking, but not much listening.
It’s not just politics or big debates either. It’s in family group chats. School pickup lines. Online threads. Holiday dinners. We’ve forgotten how to talk to each other like human beings instead of headlines.
And here’s the scary part: When we stop listening, we stop seeing each other. And when we stop seeing each other, we lose our capacity for compassion.
But it doesn’t have to stay this way.
What if the way forward isn’t about winning arguments but rebuilding conversations?
1. Get curious, not combative.
When someone says something you don’t understand or disagree with, try this: “Tell me more about that.” Not everything needs a rebuttal. Sometimes people just need to be heard. And sometimes you don’t know the whole story, so ask more assume less.
2. Lead with stories, not stats.
Arguments rarely change hearts, but stories can. Share your experience. Listen to theirs. You don’t have to agree to connect.
3. Assume complexity.
Most people are carrying more than they show. Don’t reduce someone to a label, category, or soundbite. You’d want the same grace. Maybe there’s more to the situation than you realize.
4. Stay offline when it matters.
Social media is not the best place for nuanced conversations. If it’s important, have it face-to-face or voice-to-voice. Real tone. Real eyes. Real humanity. So much of communication is nonverbal, so don’t have hard conversations that could be taken wrong in a venue that doesn’t communicate nonverbally.
5. Choose connection over being right.
You can “win” an argument and lose a relationship. That doesn’t mean you compromise truth, but it does mean you prioritize love. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is, “I’m still here, even if we don’t agree.”
You don’t have to shout louder to be heard.
You don’t have to prove your point to prove your worth.
We need people who know how to talk and even more, how to listen.
People who bring light, not heat.
People who choose dignity over division.
Let’s be those people. And it won’t hurt if we start today.
You don’t need all the answers just an open heart and a willingness to stay in the conversation.
Source: www.derrickhurst.org